Vulgarity jokes

Teacher

80 views ·

The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”

The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”

Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”

The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”

Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.

Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”

The teacher sat down and cried.

Professor

83 views ·

An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.

Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.

When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”

With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.

“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”

Meal

69 views ·

Your mom gave me a three course meal last night:

Starters - Foreplay

Main course - Reverse Cowgirl

Dessert - Blowy

Won't forget the side drink of an individual on individual bukkake.

Insult

86 views ·

Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.

Mom

27 views ·

Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?

Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!

Lesbian

856 views ·

When your girlfriend picks you up and decides to prank you by not wearing pants to a seafood restaurant:

Did you get seafood without me? It smells like fish.