Vulgarity jokes
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.
Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”
Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”
The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”
Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.
Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”
The teacher sat down and cried.
Roses are red, lemons are sour, spread your legs, give me an hour!
Roses are red, Lemons are sour; Lift your skirt up and give me an hour.
What do you call two Chinese lesbians?
Two can't chew.
Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.
Memes
Anal intercourse is for assholes.
An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.
Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.
When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”
With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.
“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”
Sydney has a fat pair of spammy flaps that smell of fish 🎣.
How do cats relieve themselves in front of people? By licking their puss.
Your mom gave me a three course meal last night:
Starters - Foreplay
Main course - Reverse Cowgirl
Dessert - Blowy
Won't forget the side drink of an individual on individual bukkake.
Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that always comes out of your mouth?
Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?
Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!
Nancy, the throat goat!
"Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom."
Your mama's like a cardboard box: open to the public and easy to nail.
When your girlfriend picks you up and decides to prank you by not wearing pants to a seafood restaurant:
Did you get seafood without me? It smells like fish.
Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.
I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.
I got knob cheesed after your sexy mom was on top, dry humping me on the vanilla-coloured living room carpet.
Q: What do nuns and bathrooms have in common?
A: They both have glory holes for pleasing.
Just looking for a cunt...
Oh hello, found one.