Vegetable jokes
Mushroom?
What do you call a baby potato?
Small fry!
If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.
What is so similar about a concrete block and a garden?
They both make vegetables.
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative? Nothing, they both make you cry when you look at it.
What is long, hard and has cum in it? Cucumber.
What is a 3 letter word that starts with S ends with X and has a vowel? Six.
What's the difference between babies and onions?
You don't cry cutting up babies.
Q: What do you call a baby in a vegetative state?
A: A tater tot.
Q) What’s the difference between a baby and a sweet potato?
A) About 400 calories.
What’s the hardest part about making vegetable soup?
To put the wheelchair in the pot.
Riddle me this, Batman, what's long, round, and has cum in the middle?
Batman: A dick.
Riddler: NO NO NOOO! It's a cucumber!
My wife said she wanted steamed vegetables with her steak, so I put her father in the hot tub.
What’s a vegetable’s favorite dance?
The cabbage patch.
Why do potatoes make good detectives?
Because they keep their eyes peeled!
The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn't carrot all.
Did you hear about the race of the tomato and lettuce? Well, the lettuce was winning and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?
I yam.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup my slow tomatoes! 🍅😂
Potato.
Last time Kenny ate a vegetable, he got banned from his mom's nursing home.