Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.
9 months later they happily had some use for their baby carriage.
2 years later they went up again then their daughter had a brother.
But 1 little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother..
Dont trust atoms they make up everything.
Dr. Seuss Died September 24 but that was a lie Dr. Seuss when he was 97 he stole a plane and the last rhyme he did was “up in the sky so very far he comes Dr. Seuss allahuakbar”
If a midget with down syndrome shows up late for work, is it okay to say she's a little tardy?
What's the difference between sand and a dildo? Sand has never gone up my ass.
What is the second hardest thing in the morning?
Getting up.
What do you call a gay drive by? A fruit roll up.
You know when you sign up for something and it says *im not a robot* guess he never had the chance to tick that
What does a light bulb and a school shooter have in common? They both light up the room
Yo mama so ugly people dress up as her at holloween
I was gonna walk up to a emo and say do you get jealous when your phone dies
I searched up self harm jokes clean but I couldn't find any :[
Never buy a epileptic kid light up sketchers
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it's a pinata... BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
My ceiling isn't the best... But it's up there!!!!
Window Problems A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now.”
In preschool, i confessed my love to my crush, and she rejected me. As heartbroken as i was, i sucked it up and went back to teaching.
Why did Sally get to go to Hawaii for free?
She washed up on the beach.
Are you enjoying my yolks. I bet there making you crack up. If not, I better scrammble
In my mother's generation, they grew up with Wonder Woman. In ours, we have to wonder if she's a woman.
