The Twin Towers ordered two pepperoni pizzas, but all they got was plane.
Two Jokes
I can swallow two pieces of string and when they come out the other end, they'll be tied together. I shit you knot.
Q: Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
A: Because they lost two of their towers.
Two sentence horror stories go.
How many beans are there in Irish chili?
Answer: 239
Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?
Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."
Two cyclists stop on a bridge. One cyclist says to the other, "Can you see that forest over there?"
The other says, "No, the trees are in the way."
If you buy two condoms, but you're banging a woman, it's fine, don't throw it away, just make her transgender.
I dunno man, worked for me.
What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."
Why are Americans so bad at Clash of Clans? Because they already lost two towers.
What did they give Elmo before he left the factory? Two test-tickles.
What did Osama have?
Two Boeings and a dream.
You also have to learn to say no. For example: "Would you like a piece of cake?" "No, I'd like two."
The Christian, the Buddhist, and the Muslim each go on a separate plane.
The Christian's and the Buddhist's flight goes well, but the Muslim's plane has a problem and crashes into two towers.
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"
What do you call two terrorists standing next to each other with their dicks out?
The Twin Towers.
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and the Leaning Tower of Pizza?
One held its balance, the other two fell.
Two Asian people have a black baby.
Something wrong.
Why is the US so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
The picture gets hung with one nail, not two.
Doctor: I have bad news.
Man: What?
Doctor: There are two things wrong with you. First, you have cancer.
Man: Oh, no...
Doctor: Second, you have Alzheimer's.
Man: Well, at least I don't have cancer!
