TV jokes
My family was watching Home Alone 2, so whenever Kevin was at the top of the Twin Towers, I threw a paper airplane at the T.V.
What was JFK's favorite school TV show?
BrainPop.
As an actor going to film a new TV show in another country, when TSA asks, "What’s the purpose of your visit?"... "I’m going to shoot a pilot" is never a good answer.
Your forehead is so big I could use it to get free TV.
Pokemon: What’s Wailmer’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
Memes
Yo mama is so dumb, she sits on the TV and watches sofa.
What’s faster than a black guy with the TV?
His little brother with the console.
Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.
TV: Water found on Mars...
Mars: 1
Africa: 0
George Floyd was in a TV show fresh Prince with no air
My girlfriend left a note on the TV saying, "This isn't working!" I don't know what she's talking about, the TV works perfectly fine.
So, a kid is taking a test, and the paper says, "In a pink bungalow, there's a pink fridge, a pink bed, a pink TV, and a pink cat. What color are the stairs?"
So the kid answers pink, like the idiot he is.
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
Why did Billy kill himself with a TV remote?
He wasn't even REMOTELY close to being happy.
I got my blind friend a TV... He never uses it.
Your mouth looks like it came from the commercials.
I told my friend to watch Naruto. It's been a week since I've seen him. Hope he comes back in one piece.
TV Darth Vader: "I'm your father!"
Orphans: "Yea."
Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?
1. Listening to your teacher.
2. Not having your phone/game/TV.
3. Not having nicotine.
What did the police say on the TV during 9/11?
"Call 911!"