Donald Trump Jokes
*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*
Say what you will about Donald Trump, at least he's not Biden.
What's the difference between me and the rest of America?
I love one and hate the other.
Donald Trump will return to Twitter.
Lmao Trump and Putin dislike my jokes! 🤣😂
Trump cheated so much he cheated himself out of an election!
Why is Trump always in debt? His university isn't paid off yet!
What's the difference between Obama and Trump?
Obama was a president and Trump was a whiny bitch!
Trump likes to grab 'em by the pussy. Putin likes to grab them by their tiny hands.
"Lock him up, you know, Trump!"
A dead Russian is Trump's accountant.
White 40 year olds love little white kids, and so does Trump! The biggest hands to touch the kids and his daughter!
What's blue, red, and white and dead all over?
Trump's dead Russian mates.
What did Trump say to Ukraine when Putin bombed them?
"It was Antifa!!!! And China!!!!"
Donald Trump and the Pope were standing on a platform in front of a crowd of people. The Pope said to Donald Trump, “I can make everyone in this audience happy with one small swipe of my hand.”
Donald Trump replies, “That’s not possible. You’ll have to show me.” Then the Pope slaps him.
What is orange and will soon be wearing prison orange? Trump.
A little riddle...
Trump has it short, Kennedy has it long, the Pope has it but he doesn't use it, what is it?
...
Obviously the Surname, what are you thinking about you pervert?
What does a Trump supporter use to load his/her AR-15?
A MAGAzine.
Donald Trump is so stupid his fanboys dislike this.
Your mom's so fat, Donald Trump built the wall around her.