Transportation jokes
What's white at the front and black at the back? A bus.
What was OceanGate's biggest regret?
Not painting Dylan Mulvaney on the side of the Titan submarine for when it sunk like Bud Light's profits.
What did the beer can say to the other? "Open me, please!"
What did the coconut say to the other? "Crack!"
Why did the jalapeño cross the road? I got spicy!
Why did the hubcap cross the road? Crack!
Why jazz, Jr. Get to the other side of the creek? Don’t break a leg!
What did the tornado cross the road? Let’s spin again!
Why did the turkey get to the other side of the creek? Don’t break a leg!
What did the bunny get to the side of the road? Get furry!
Why did the basketball player not get on the bus?
Because he couldn’t be caught travelling! 😂
What is the difference between interstate and intercourse?
I was on the train today and saw a cow on it.
It was quite strange until I realized it was Alfie's mum.
How did the fat person cross the road?
It rolled.
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
Why couldn’t the orange cross the road? Because it ran out of juice.
Yo mama's so fat, it took me two buses and a train to get to her good side.
Q: What's yellow and floats?
A: A bus full of children.
Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"
I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"
She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"
I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"
Blind people driving on the highway would be the world's biggest, and shortest game of bumper cars!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get hit by a bus.
How did Helen Keller drive?
One hand on the wheel, one hand on the road.
Are you a white van? Because I would love to put children in you.
Your hairline is so wonky, "Wheels on the Bus" goes round and round on your hairline.
My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.
Yo mama so fat that when she steps into an elevator, she has to go down.