Transportation jokes
I don't have a carbon footprint. I drive everywhere.
Kill yourself in any way. I'm killing myself the HIGHway.
Kill yourself in anyway. I'm doing it the HIGHway.
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
I pushed a disabled kid down a busy road and yelled out, "Mario Kart!"
Put a kid in a wheelchair in the Twin Towers. Damn, I love Hot Wheels!
McDonald's has a drive through.
Twin Towers has a fly through.
When your plane heads for New York...
I set a wheelchair on fire and called it "Hot Wheels."
What did one tower say to the other?
Damn, you looking PLANE!
Open wide, here comes the airplane!
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair and said, "Hot Wheels!"
If Kobe missed a shot, his helicopter will too.
What do you call an Arab flying a plane?
A pilot.
You racist fuck!
What do you call an Arab and a black man flying a plane?
Pilots. You racist f*ck.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A school bus full of children.
I was driving a car and a fat person was crossing the street. When I swerved my car to miss her, I ran out of gas.
What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?
Organ harvesting.
"Water exists."
Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"