Tragedy jokes
Why did the Columbine High School basketball team lose the big game?
Because they lost their two best shooters...
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They ordered pizza, but all they got was plane.
What do emos and the Twin Towers have in common? There were two, but now there are none.
What’s the difference between 911 and an abortion?
With 911 there was a victim to tell the tale.
Nice! Angry Birds really has improved.
Memes
Why did the Titanic cross the river to get to the bottom?
Hey, are you a terrorist? 'Cause I rate you 9/11.
Why is the leaning tower of pizza leaning? 'Cuz it had better reflexes than the twin towers.
Last night, I burned an orphanage. There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do? Tell your parents?"
What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”
What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”
People in plays say that everyone's life is a drama, but mine's a tragedy.
Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with you parents soon." He said, "My parents died." I said, "I know...." I went for the cliffs.
Me and my brother were called the twin towers. My brother lived up to his title after the plane crash.
Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail?
A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You make them clap until they go home.
What do terrorists do on 9/11? They have a game of Jenga.
What's the worst part about hearing a special needs kid getting hit by a car?
Having to listen to the wheelchair scraping for a mile and a half.
Why are Americans bad chess players?
They lost 2 towers.
When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering, but you walk toward his gun; "I will finish what you started."
My uncle died on September 11. He was the greatest pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.