My aunt used to say, "Slow and steady wins the race." She died in a fire.
How did the man with no arms commit suicide?
We'll never know - he didn't leave a note.
Today in class, I screamed "Jenga!"
We were watching a 9/11 documentary.
A missile hit a hospital earlier this morning. Fortunately, no one was injured - but 100 were killed.
Why was the Tower of Pisa always leaning?
Cuz it wanted better accuracy than the Twin Towers.
9/11 jokes are the bomb.
Kobe Bryant never missed a shot.
But he nailed that mountain.
There was an air crash of a Boeing 737-800 which can carry around 300 passengers.
It crashed in a cemetery.
They recovered 500 bodies.
I'm pretty sure that 9/11 was the biggest game of Jenga ever recorded in history.
"the floor is lava!"
- everyone, Pompeii 79 A.D.
I wasn’t understanding what I had to do for homework, so my teacher said, “Let me break it down for you like the Twin Towers.”
If you kill an orphan, would that count as a squad wipe?
A couple is sitting down, holding hands, and having a picnic after their wedding when the husband's friend walks over and says,
"Jenny and Jonathan sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes abrupt, tragic miscarriage! Then comes blame. Then comes despair, two hearts damaged, beyond repair. Johnathan leaves Jenny, and writes on the tree: D-I-V-O-R-C-E."
I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don’t understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what’s so sad?" and she said, "What do you think was running through these kid’s head before they died?" I replied, "probably a bullet." She gasped and said, "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent’s heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."
"I hate when people make 9/11 jokes because my grandfather died during the Twin Tower attacks. He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia."
Paul Walker's death was a tragedy, but at least he went out in a blaze of glory.
Everyone laughs when a bully teases someone, but no one laughs when that person commits suicide.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap until their parents come home.
Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: Twin Tower victims, they got 80 stories in ten seconds.
People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
