Tragedy jokes
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
There is this celebrity everybody thought was so down to earth. That was until he hung himself.
John Lennon: "What a nice view."
John walked outside.
He got shot.
:skull:
Who was not happy that the Titanic sank? The fish under it.
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion, but the bullet didn't...
Memes
My aunt used to say, "Slow and steady wins the race." She died in a fire.
What's 9/11 survivors' least favorite NFL team?
New York Jets.
Twin Towers ordered Little Caesars but they got jets.
After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park.
Lord: "Has something happened while I was gone?"
Gardener: "Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burying your dog."
Lord: "My dog died?!"
Gardener: "Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down."
Lord: "My mansion?! How?!"
Gardener: "Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains."
Lord: "Why was she so distraught?"
Gardener: "She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped."
Lord: "My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?!"
Gardener: "Oh right! Your cancer test results!"
What's Kobe's favorite song? "It's Going Down" for real.
School shooting happens:
Foreign exchange student: Sobbing under desk.
American student: “First time?”
The student from Irak with an AK47: "RAtatata..."
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
Where did Sarah go after the bombing?
Everywhere. 💀
*Hears the news about Sandy Hook* Person 1: "God, I can only imagine what was going through those kids' heads in the last moments of their lives..."
Person 2: "Probably Bullets."
Person 1: "OMG!! Can you even think of what their parents are going through?!"
Person 2: "Probably Coffin Brochures."
Person 1: "...."
Person 2: "It's called dark humor. Dark humor is like food, not everyone gets it."
I'm pretty sure that 9/11 was the biggest game of Jenga ever recorded in history.
I think Paul Walker and 9/11 jokes are great, but when I tell them to others, they tend to crash and burn.
Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor jokes?
It can't hit home.
What's the problem with 9/11 jokes?
They are just two plane.
The joke is my life.
What do you call a 5-year-old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.