Worst Jokes Ever
What makes a cult and a racist family of 5 common?
Not all are friends.
One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor's kid laying face-first in the grass, not breathing.
Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor's big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little Johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone.
Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, "I'm sorry to hear that your child has gone missing."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bikini.
Bikini who?
Oh, that was just a bikini.
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.
Me: Why do you need to use shampoo when you are already bald? 🤣
How did Hitler tie his shoes?
He tied them in little Nazis.
Ukraine (🇺🇦) vs Russia (🇷🇺), place your bets!
I wish the doctor would prescribe me some medicine that's actually useful, like cyanide.
A midget had a disease, and the cure was on the highest shelf.
When the quiet kid lost a game of basketball and reaches into his bag,
other people in the gym: "Oh shit this nigga bout to shoot."
Riddle me this. Riddle me that.
Why did my parents never come back?
A dad told his son never to hit girls, so the son replied, "I promise."
When the son got older, he was doing the dirty with "a girl," and the girl says, "Spank me, daddy..." and the son responds, "My dad said never to hit a girl."
Then the "girl" takes off the wig, and it's his dad, and the dad said, "Good job, son!"
Son:...... um
I would roast you, but I'm not supposed to burn trash.
I got arrested because I cremated a guy. They said the guy had been alive when I burned him. I mean, it's an early cremation—what's the difference?
Roses are red, I sniff marijuana, I have five fingers, The middle one is for your vagina.
What do girls and rocks have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
I got my blind friend a TV... He never uses it.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some mairawanah.
Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna," but dumb-ass Jill forgot her pills, and now they have 12 kids.
What do cats have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
What is a cannibal's favorite drink?
Coffee.