Worst Jokes Ever
Why was Helen Keller truly an inspiration?
She learned how to read and write despite being from Alabama!
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
A: Because they come back, unlike their parents.
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better, so I sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wife's broken leg.
Why couldn't the orphan get an Android? Because it didn't have a home button.
What does an orphan wish they could do?
Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.
My uncle hid my weed, so I hid his wheelchair.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Holocaust victim?
Harry made it out of the chamber.
What’s the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
Dumb person: Wat idk mean?
Person 1: I don’t know.
Dumb one: Oh u don’t know okie I ask Googol.
Person 1: Wait idk means--
Dumb one (to Googol): WAT DOS IDK MANNN?
Googol: I don’t know.
Dumb one: OH ME GOOOD EVEN GOGLO DOESYN KNOWWW
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
My lesbian neighbors gave me a Rolex. Guess they misunderstood when I said I wanted to watch.
Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."
Where do walls shop?--Walmart.
Are you a highway? Because I wanna lay on you.
Wife: I’m pregnant.
Husband: Hi pregnant, I’m dad.
Wife: No, you’re not.
One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.
How did Jesus become self-sovereign?
He screws himself and becomes his own creator.
Jesus will be history when I realize he's behind me.