Worst Jokes Ever
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Dooris." "Dooris who?" "Door is locked, that's why I'm knocking!"
Why can't orphans play football?
Because they can't be on the home team.
What type of horse can jump higher than a house?
All houses can't jump.
Imagine being expelled from school for bringing a weapon to school.
Did you eat Chef Boyardee's food?
No, why?
Boy are deez nuts so big.
What’s the difference between a violin and a viola?
The viola burns longer.
What’s the difference between an onion and a viola?
No one cries when they cut up the viola.
Why do violists stand for long periods outside of people's houses? They can't find the key and don't know when to come in.
Why do violists smile when they play? Because ignorance is bliss, and they don't know what can't hurt them.
The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A baby tied to the back of a truck.
What do a jack-o-lantern and an emo have in common?
They can both carve a new emotion.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Q: What’s the difference between apples and orphans?
A: Apples get picked.
Why did 10 have trauma?
Because 10 was in the middle of 9/11.
Why does an orphan like church so much? So he can call someone "father."
Why does the orphan like nature? He can call someone "mother."
People said that Kobe could fly so high, but that did not end well.
Do you know what dogs and orphans don't have in common?
Dogs get loved.
What do you call a gay drive up?
A fruit roll-up.