Worst Jokes Ever
I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.
A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”
I said, “Well, which one are you then?”
One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.
What did the Chinese guy say to the Italian guy?
同性恋球蜥蜴 (translate it)
What do you call a Jamaican proctologist?
Pokémon!
Which nut has won the World Cup the most times? A Brazil nut.
A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."
The hardest part of picking up a hitch hiker is tying them up.
20 years later
Johnny: Hey dad.
Dad: Yea?
Johnny: Fuck you, I ain't comin' back to your grave in 16 years, then ima come back, BITCH!
Dad: Doing the same thing I did to you and your mother, ay? I deserve it :( ;O not real...NOT A FUCKING ALL.
Johnny: Yea you kinda fucking do.
Dad:...
What is a snake's favorite drug?
Adder-all.
Roses are red, violets are blue, The children are fast, But Elmo is faster, Bow down to your master!
Roses are red, violets are blue, give me free OnlyFans so I don't touch the youth.
What was the name of a Roman guide?
Guide Gius.
This account is run by a peadophile.
When you are chilling in the World Trade Center, and then you suddenly get airplane WiFi.
Why can't orphans have an iPhone?
They can't find the home button.
What cigarettes does Churchill's wife like to smoke?
Blue Winston.
What happens when the terminator pees?
Gasoline descent.
Why did 10 run away?
Now it's 8, 9/11.
Why don't orphans play baseball? Cause they don't know where home is!
You are so ugly Santa goes "ho ho ho holy sh*t."