Worst Jokes Ever

What did Jarrah say to Hanjour?

A monkey eats cheese. He was lactose intolerant.

Our hairline goes way back before dinosaurs lived.

Running out of time to cut the grass, may have to cut it short.

I was gonna stop for the cops, but I ran because I was high (the song don't copyright me plz).

Little Johnny and his mom were sitting in church one day when suddenly Johnny said, "Mom, I think I'm gonna throw up!"

Then his mom said, "Go across the field and into the bushes, hopefully no one will see you there."

Johnny comes back a minute later, and his mom asks, "Did you make it?" Then Johnny said, "No, but there was a box by the door that SAID 'For The Sick!'"

How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!

My grandma stubbed her toe in an elevator on September 21st.

"Goodness, that's what Post Malone sounds like?"

"Give me some pre-Malone hip hop any day!"

If a vegan and a vegan have a fight, is it still considered beef?

When the police saw your hairline, they gave your barber a breathalyzer test.

"Chairing is caring, folks!"

What happened when the emo kid gave the tree a high five? It left him hanging.

Why do people want their grass to be emo?

So the grass will cut itself.

What did one orphan say to the other orphan?

"Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"

Why is death taken so lightly?

Because anyone can take it.

You are like Papa.

Friends don't lie.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

His PC overheated.

Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road?

To get the milk and to get to the dark side.

Why does America have more guns than people?