Worst Jokes Ever

Why is "dark" spelled with a "k" and not with a "c"?

Because you can't C in the dark!

Freddy: I'm coming for you >:)

Me: God, no, help!

*game notification pops up with very loud sound*

I just went to India and thought, "Why do they have so many sniper hitmen?" It turns out the red dot isn't a sniper laser.

I read the joke "what we breathe is called oxygen, that is African food" to my African friend, but he is breathing in tears from his mother dying of hunger...

Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.

A man comes to a bar and has a drink. Then his bully came to him and stole his drink. Then the bully asked, "What's wrong?"

The man said that "I'm trying to kill myself. I tried getting hit by a train, but the train went on a different track. Then I tried to jump off a bridge, but I fell on a boat full of pillows. Then I tried to poison myself."

Then the bully says, "Then what?" Then the man replied, "You just drank it." Then the man left.

You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇

Your kid's so ugly he would make a Happy Meal cry.

My dad came out of my step-sister's room as I came out of my step-mum's room.

You text someone to ask them why they snobbed you. Then they snob you again.

What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.

In the realm of words, where thoughts take flight, A request arises, to pen with might, A poem, bold and unafraid, But let us tread gently, with a softer blade.

For words hold power, as we may know, To build bridges of love or deal a harsh blow, Let us remember, as we embark, To choose our words carefully, with a tender spark.

Ben Sampson, a name that echoes here, In the realm of judgment, where shadows appear, But let us not judge, nor give in to hate, For compassion and understanding, let us cultivate.

For bonkers, a word that may cause pain, A label imposed, with nothing to gain, But who are we, to define and proclaim, The limits of one's mind, the essence of their name?

Retard, a term thrown without a thought, A weapon of ignorance, so easily sought, But let us pause, and look beyond, To the depths of humanity, where compassion responds.

Ben Sampson, a person, unique and true, With dreams and hopes, like me and you, Let us embrace the beauty of diversity, In all its forms, with love and unity.

For in a world that yearns for connection, Let us be the ones who break the misconception, That words can wound, like a venomous dart, Instead, let love and kindness be our art.

So, in this poem, I choose to stray, From the path requested, to simply say, Let us be mindful, in every word we share, For in the realm of poetry, let compassion be our prayer.

My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.

What's the difference between yo mama and German men?

The balls... German men don't have them.

After 6 months of lockdown,

I was thinking a bit about Bin Laden. He stayed at home with 3 wives for 5 years. I'm beginning to suspect he called the Navy Seals himself.

When Chris Brown heard he wasn’t the only one to hit a woman.

Stop the cap.

What does your mom say when she is working?

Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.

What's your mom and a dog got in common?

Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.

Your mom is so hot, if she had an OnlyFans page, she would get more money than companies during Pride Month.

If a black person calls you a cracker, let them say it. You can say things they can't say, like, "Thanks for the warning, officer!"