Worst Jokes Ever
Things said by racist aliens:
"Some of my best friends are Green."
"I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship."
"You're very pretty for a Purple girl."
"We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!"
"Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people."
"You 2-headed people are so stupid!"
"No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes."
"Get out of my store you grigger!"
"The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Two nuns were sitting on a bench. A flasher flashed them, and one of the nuns had a stroke... but the other one was too far away :)
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
Why do women have periods?
Because they deserve them, haha!
What did the brother cell say when the sister cell stepped on his foot? Ow, mitosis! (my toe, sis)
Your mom gay.
Justin Bieber
My wife purely hates me for me having sex with our daughter.
It's not my fault I couldn't wait to get out of the abortion clinic!
Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman... no other reasons besides that.
What do you get when you cross an octopus with a Mexican?
I don't know, but man can it pick lettuce.
Have you ever wondered why you never see a gay guy in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to become a vegetable when you’re already a fruit.
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
"Why didn't the skeleton climb the mountain?"
"It didn't have the guts!"
Why is the ocean so salty? Probably because the land doesn't wave back.
What's another name for cumming inside a woman? Loading the dishwasher.
Yo mama so fat that you need a jack stand to get her up.
Yo mama so fat that when she gets in the truck, it breaks.
Life is better without my dad annoying me (him smacking me, screaming for something useless, limiting my screen time, and much more).
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Little boy blue.
Little boy blue who?
Michael Jackson.