Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a Chinese person with 1 leg? Tie Son Whu.
Did you hear about the "Funny Doctor"?
He'll have you in "Stitches"!
What keeps an emo kid from hitting the ground?
The rope.
"Remember, switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
Your hairline is so bad, it goes back in time!
Your hairline is so expired, it’s more expired than your milk!
My wife is so fat. After sex, I rolled over twice. I was still on top of the bitch!
I’m tall when I’m young, and I’m short when I’m old. What am I?
Why were the Twin Towers sad?
Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza, but got plane instead.
Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You look like Shrek, And you make me peck.
Yesterday I got detention because I said to the emo kid, "Come hang with us."
One day, the Pope is coming to America in his limo, and he said to the driver, "Why don’t you let me drive for once?"
The driver thinks to himself, "Well, I can’t say no to this guy; he’s the Pope." So the driver pulls over, and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while, the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, "Slow down a bit; you might get pulled over."
The Pope says, "Ahhh, don’t worry about it; I’m the Pope." So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments, he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car, and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, "Oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute?"
The Pope says, "Sure." The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, "Guys, I just pulled over someone really important."
They ask who, "The President?"
"No, more important."
"The president of another country?"
"No, more important."
"An ambassador?"
"No, even more important."
"Well, who is it?"
"I don’t know, but the Pope is the chauffeur."
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!
What would you rather be, emo or handicapped?
Trick question, emo is a handicap.
Why do emo kids drink only herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.
When does an Emo wake up in the morning? After the rooster says, "Cutadoodledo!"
Nun's worst holiday? Norfolk.
Nun's best holiday? Bangkok.
A nun going down a water shoot? She never felt so wet in all her life!
Yo momma's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.