Worst Jokes Ever

Yo mama is so nasty, she buys sex toys at the second-hand shop.

I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.

What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette?

I don’t have a Corvette in my garage.

I just ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon.

I'll let you know.

When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute?

2001/9/11.

"Ho, ho, ho, what do you want for Christmas, little boy? Longer than two months to live."

Why did little Billy drop his ice cream cone?

Cuz he got hit by a bus while crossing the street.

Finish the sentence.

Salt and Vi.....

I have no legs.

I went to Pen Island for vacation this summer. There were a lot of bones.

Papa: Johnny, Johnny.

Johnny: Yes, Papa?

Papa: Open wide.

Johnny: HAHAHA.

Papa: *unzips pants*

Johnny: *crying* No, Papa!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a shit? I wanna know how it got the car started!

Why are Deepika Amar's jokes so shit?

Because he is a smelly cunt.

I don't see why Africans complain about not having water. They have free chocolate milk.

Why do people shake cigarette boxes?

To wake up the cancer.

Porn.

So Helen Keller walked into a bar, then a stool, then a table, then a door...

I was once caught doing it with a 16 year old in my bedroom. Boy, was my wife mad. She yelled "HOW CAN YOU F*** OUR DAUGHTER?!". Haha, yeah, she was mad.

Anyways, that's why your mother and I are getting a divorce, Timmy.

One day there were these 3 cowboys sitting next to a fire and they were telling each other about their adventures. Well, the first cowboy said, "I tangled with a bull that killed 6 people, so I wrestled that son of a bitch to the ground with my bare hands."

The second cowboy said, "That's nothing. Yesterday I was walking on a trail and came across a rattler, so I picked it up, bit its head off, and drank all his venom in one gulp."

The third cowboy remained quiet, stirring the embers of the fire with his penis.

All the lines on the LGBT flag are straight.