Worst Jokes Ever

What type of pictures do orphans take?

Selfies.

Hi Alex, you will probably not see this till the morning, but I just wanted to say I have had fun since you were here. Also, thank you so much for protecting me and being there for me. And yeah, have a good day!

Twitch & YouTube revenue. Haha funny joke, eheh!

Yo mama so fat that when she was on the moon, she had it sent right into the abyss of outer space.

What did the acorn say when it grew up?

Geometry.

(Geometry= "Gee, I'm a tree!")

How on God's green earth does my boyfriend have a phone?

JK WE NEED TO TALK ILL TYPE THE SECRET CODE (YOU'LL KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.) GREEN PUSSY CAT LIKES BANNANS.

What are the similarities between a broken tire and me?

We were both caused by broken rubber.

So cinema.

Are you my friend?

Because I would make you more than that.

What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?

One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!

What's the difference between your mom and a troll?

Nothing, they both look the same.

Me: Mom, stop, you are not funny. You never make jokes.

Mom: I made you.

Where did the king put his armies?

In his sleevies.

My grandpa has the heart of a lion,

and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

"Alex! We need to talk! Now!"

Alya, I need to talk to you now. If you don't reply, I will kermit the not living, and if you don't think I will, I will post your OnlyFans photos I get every month for $5.99 a week (high price if you ask me)!

Do you know who Helen Keller is?

Neither did she.

What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.

My ex was so full of shit, she probably poured toilet cleaner in her nose to get relief.

A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.