Worst Jokes Ever

Who is the least young Dave?

Dave-on.

Eons it takes to Daveon the haters.

Why did Daveon go to the doctor?

Because he was feeling "Daveon" in the dumps.

How many Daveons does it take to change a lightbulb? None, he prefers to stay in the dark.

Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.

What did Daveon say when he saw a spider? "I'm Dave-on with this!"

How does Daveon like his coffee? Decaf-eon.

What's Daveon's favorite type of music? Daveon-core.

Why did Daveon decide to become a magician? Because he wanted to make his problems "Daveon" disappear.

What do you call a group of Daveons? A "daveon-ation."

Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday. He gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it.

I asked him what the bullseye was for. He said, "Target practice."

This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory. One day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station. I told her, "So you can weigh yourself on the truck scale?"

I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk.

The dad finally came back with the milk!

I complained to my dad why he never took me to the zoo.

He said if they want you, they’ll come get you.

I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.

Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.

I met a fat chick at the beach.

People started asking me what I use for bait, or do you want us to help throw the whale back in the water?

When I have sex, my girlfriend screams, especially when I walk in on her.

Tuesday, I was looking at my family tree, and two dogs were using it.

My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"

Don’t be racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.