Worst Jokes Ever
Why didn't the butcher cut the fillet?
Because it was a misteak.
Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?
Never mind. It’s too cheesy!
I like my kids like I like my lamps.
Hung from the ceiling.
How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?
Simple. All in the ashtray.
I'm so poor that when people come over to my house, I come out the window and say, "Ding Dong!"
My aunt's star sign was Cancer, so it's pretty ironic how she died...
She was eaten by a giant crab.
Don't drink and park.
Accidents cause people.
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.
The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"
The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"
So I thought about trying to eat a clock one day.
After about 13 tries, I realized this was very time consuming.
He dead, he alive, but most importantly, he got a new hard drive.
Where did Stephen Hawking go after he died?
FNAF Sister Location.
What do Will from "Stranger Things" and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air have in common? They're both named Will, and their lives both got flipped, turned upside down.
There were 3 guys in detention called Zip, Willy, and Pee, and they were all being naughty. The teacher came in and said, "Zip down, Willy out, Pee in the corner."
I went to the doctor because I had a steering wheel in my pants, and it was driving me nuts.
Person 1: Why did you put the baby feet first into the blender?
Person 2: To see his facial expression. Why else?
Yo mama so fat that she needs 12 queen size mattresses to go to sleep.
Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"
What is the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?
Slick her hair back, she looks 15.
Why do hackers in Africa have hard times dealing with firewalls?
They don't have water.
How is being in the military like getting a blowjob?
The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.