Worst Jokes Ever

My grandfather died at Auschwitz.

Poor fella fell off the guard tower.

What’s the difference between women and condoms?

There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.

So, my dad was drinking, so he was drunk, and I was sad. But can you be my friend, please?

I tried to stick to One Direction, but then they started to shoot the gay bar...

Why do they never serve beer at a math party?

Because you can't drink and derive.

What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? The trombone!

Quit making those progeria jokes. They get old very quickly.

Why don't you shower with a Pokemon? He might Pikachú.

What noise does Sally like to say? Splat!

I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

Why are wives also called a housekeeper?

Because after the divorce, they keep the house.

I went to a seafood shop.

I pulled a muscle.

Yo mama is so ugly Bob the Builder said, "I can't fix that!"

Why did the duck not enjoy his restaurant date?

Because he didn't want to see the bill.

What's a skeleton's favorite instrument?

A trombone.

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree?

One baby nailed to 10 trees.

I will always remember the last noise I hear in my school, "oogga booga motherf***ers," click, boom!

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food?

Neither have they...

I wanted to get brain surgery.

I changed my mind.

What’s the difference between a dumpster full of dead babies and a Lamborghini?

I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.