Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the blonde chick buy two Plan B pills?
She wanted to be for sure for sure!
Teacher: Alright kids. 50, 49, 48, 47. What comes before 47?
Kid: AK!
Everyone else: 🚪 🏃🏾♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏾♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏿🏃🏿♀️ 🎒 🏃🏻
I hate it when ever I bring a girl over, my parents don't care, but when I bring one of my friends that's a boy, they're like, "Keep the door open," and I'm gay.
Why does the heart listen to music a lot?
Because it loves feeling the beat.
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill's candy.
Jack got a big shock with a mouth full of huge cock, because Jill's real name is Randy, and she had no candy, just he gave Jack a handy.
What do you call a violent fish?
A smackeral!
Q: How did the explorers get to school?
A: They rode the Colum-bus!
When there’s an earthquake, coffins become underground maracas.
How do you make a plumber sad?
You kill his family.
Me: So you two girls are from England?
Girls: Wales.
Me: Oh, I see, so you two whales are from England.
Why didn't the orphan cross the road? Where was he gonna go?
If you throw a nun, is it called a... Nunchuck???
Bosses are like seagulls.
They fly in, make a lot of noise, crap all over everything, then fly out.
Me: John, what did he do earlier?
John: Hold on, I’m trying to think.
Me: I thought I smelled poop.
A boy is sitting in a dentist chair getting braces, and a dentist comes in and says, "Brace yourself!"
Q: What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door?
A: Mat.
Animal jokes, eh?
Toucan play at that game.
Did you hear about the dyslexic cop? He jumped off his horse and blew his whistle!
You mom.
Why do orphans go to church so much?
So they can have someone to call father.