Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Did you hear that Stephen Hawking wrote a new book? It's called "Around The House in Eighty Days."

  • 0

    • A man walks into a bar and orders 3 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down?"

    The man says, "I just found out my niece is gay." The next day, he orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down now?" The man says, "I just found out my son is gay."

    The next day, he orders 6 shots of whiskey. The bartender says, "Got anybody who likes women?" The man says, "My wife does."

  • 6

    • A blind man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bartender replies with, "I'm blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde." Then says, "Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke?" The blind guy responds with, "No, I don't wanna tell it that many times."

  • 8

    • How do you stop a baby from crawling around in a circle on the floor?

    You nail its other hand to the floor.

  • 1

    • What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.

    I’m giving in my two week resignation to life... it’s not you ... it’s me!!!

    I asked a poor old woman if I could take her home. She smiled and said yes. However, the expression on her face soon changed when I started walking away with her cardboard box.

  • 1

    • Husband: "I bet you can't say something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time."

    Wife: "You have the biggest penis out of all your friends."

  • 1