Worst Jokes Ever

After an explosion at a French cheese factory... all that was left was De Brie.

I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “What do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed.

Most women can’t pull off sarcasm.

People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.

Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.

A black man entered a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.

The bartender says, "That looks exotic, where’d you get it?"

"Africa," the parrot responded.

My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"

Yo, forehead is so big...the photo on yo driver's license says "to be continued on the back."

Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.

Yo mama so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued."

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

I was very lonely so I bought some shares. -- It's nice to have a bit of company.

You call it suicide. I call it a failed parkour attempt.

A little boy decided to burn a house down. The father put his arm around his wife, tears in his eyes, saying, "That's arson."

It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.

A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. It's a Shitzu.

Helen Keller walked into a bar, and a table, and chairs.

What do you call a depressed emo? Dead.

What were Steven Hawking's last words?

Error 404 File Not Found.

What has three balls and flies through space?

E.T. the extra testicle.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.