Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

My Friend: Why does Santa look like that?

My 15 Year Old Friend: He has secateurs cancer...

Me: I heard it's because he comes once a year.

*Everyone Looks at me*

What do you call the Illuminati when they take over the world and control everything?

The Jew World Order.

Q. If a pedophile, necrophile, and a guy who is into incest are all sitting in a car, who's driving?

A. A police officer.

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    • An old man saw the TikTok trend of people throwing it back. The old man wanted to do it with his wife. The man set up everything needed and did the video. He threw it back first, then his wife, but instead of an old lady, it was ashes.

    I gave an orphan 5 dollars and I said, "Spend it on a candy bar." I came back 5 minutes later and he didn't have a candy bar. So I look over and I see that he has a piggy bank that has 40 dollars and I said, "Where did you get that?" He said, "For being homeless," and I said, "What are you going to spend it on?" He looked at me and said, "I'm going to pay money for a mother."

    My sister just sits on the toilet with her iPad, then I go to do something at the sink and she says, "Bella, give me toilet paper!" Then I am annoyed, like super annoyed.

    You: Its nighttime, shouldn't we be heading to bed?

    Boy Roommate: Ok, are you Top or Bottom?

    You: Uhhhhhhh

    Boy Roommate: No dumby, bunk beds.

    You: Thank God.

    Boy Roommate: But if you wanna, we can...

    You: *faints*

    What do Call of Duty players say when they shoot up a school?

    654-721-8940

    (If you understand the joke, you're a god.)