Worst Jokes Ever

What do pears and emo kids have in common?

They both be hanging.

I killed a man in '94.

Wife: Honey, I’m pregnant. Husband: Hi Pregnant, I’m dad. Wife: No, you’re not.

Your mama is so fat that when she ate a burger, she liked it.

You're so poor that homeless people feel sorry for you.

Q: What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college?

A: Bison.

How many times was Bin Laden shot?

911 times.

"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.

So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"

Math Teacher: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"

Student: "A drinking problem."

Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.

College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.

What do you never say to gay people?

IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS! 🤣🤣🤣🏳️‍🌈

Egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin' ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, motherfucker look like a damn balloon.

Call me Kobe 'cause I'm finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo' parents. Mr. Clean, bootleg Saitama lookin' ass mfer. No hair? :(

What do you call a Pegasus that is being sus?

A megasus!

Hey girl, are you a scientist?

Cause you made my thing into a baking soda volcano.

What’s a gay person’s favorite race track?

Rainbow Road.

What's the similarities between the New York Jets and the World Trade Center?

They both fall in September.

Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."

Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."

Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."

Teacher: "*stands up*"

Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."

Why don't paralyzed people laugh?

They hate stand-up comedy.