Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a blind German?
A Nazi (not see).
In life, some people have it harder than others.
That's why Viagra exists.
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
John pretended to be a doctor.
Motu came to him. He said, "I lost my hunger."
John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said, "Your hunger is back!"
Then, Motu said, "I lost my taste."
John said, "Number 1, bring some water." Motu drank it and said, "This is petrol!" John said, "Your taste is back!"
Motu said, "I lost my memory."
John said, "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said, "But Number 1 brought water." John said, "Your memory is back!"
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
What did the Buddhist say to the pizza delivery boy?
"Make me one with everything."
What did the sushi say to the bee?
Wa sa Bee.
It's easy to tell if a skeleton is lying to you because you can see right through them.
What is Hitler's least favorite fish?
Jewfish.
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.
You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.
An optimist says, "The glass is half full."
A pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."
A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air."
Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water!"
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
You're so bald that Disney uses your head for movie scripts.
What's the difference between MH370 and my dad?
Both disappeared, but one killed 239 people.
What’s the hardest part about being a PEDO?
Fitting in.
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
An ugly, poor teenage girl found a genie lamp in her backyard. The genie said, "I will grant you 3 wishes, but under 1 condition."
"What is it?" she asked.
"After I grant your final wish, you have to have sex with me," the genie replied.
"Okay, for my 1st wish, I wish to be the prettiest girl at my school," the genie snapped his fingers and made her pretty.
"For my 2nd wish, I wish for my family to be rich," the genie snapped his fingers and told her her family is now the richest in town.
"And your final wish?" the genie asked.
"I wish I had a sabertoothed vagina."