Worst Jokes Ever
Boss: Why are you so bad at driving trains? How many have you derailed this year?
Me: Sorry, boss, it’s hard to keep track.
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the chicken coop?
Yo mama so stupid, she starved in a grocery store!
What show do orphans hate?
"American Dad."
I know I've changed my name from tj to selfish king but know it's gunna be selfishking#781.
Yo mama's cheeks are red, I don't know why.
Hey selfish king, I see you need a girlfriend ;)
Imagine everyone being hoes.
What is a kidnapper's favorite shoe?
White vans.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.
Who is Santa's favorite singer?
Elf-is Presley.
Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"
Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"
I wanted to play Fruit Ninja, but remembered I don’t have a phone. Guess I gotta draw fruit on my arm!
Your momma's so fat, she had to take a selfie using the Hubble telescope.
Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in them.
"Left, center, right, and apolitical, also skeptical, are also a joke."
"Death to the west!"
My mom once ate a full giant cheesecake, and we were walking to our flight back home, and she had to sh*t.
We were walking to the bathroom, and she full on [did it] in front of the carousel. She had a lump of poo in her pants... True story, haha!
Hope the towers are doing well this morning, and I'll get back to you!
What do Shrek and onions have in common?
*LAYERS*