Tooth jokes
(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes.)
What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
I was going to tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.
Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They’re painful to look at.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
How do you give a woman from Alabama a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, nice tooth!"
Memes
One day, Johnny told his dad that a girl in his class liked him. He thought she was cute. She said, "Aw, you're like candy!" He didn't say anything. He said, "Why don't you think I am sweet like candy?" Little Johnny said, "Well, sometimes I get a toothache, and it hurts, so I stop eating it, like I stopped liking you."
What do dentists call their x-rays?
Tooth picks.
Why did the penguin pull out a tooth? It was Mexican.
Memes
Community
I want some loser no-lifer girlfriend. Here are my preferences: ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
smelly, always says she's pheromone maxxing, not fart-or-poop-smelly tho, just all-the-other-parts-smelly if you get me
crusty skin, oily hair, green armpit gas and flies around her, bad breath, people around her would normally gag (but she doesn't go out so the only physical real human she knows is me)
hating show… Read more
I have Trypophobia and looked at a bleeding tooth fungus
Have you ever wanted something that was so clear in your mind that you could taste it? You mean like human flesh? Eh, sort of It's a feeling like a rumbling in your gut that you could finally be faced with A billion needy faces I guess what I mean to say is, for the first time in my life I might have to be ready for this Ready to be the one who's leading from the front Gotta come into my own Gotta come into my throne… Read more