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Toilet

Toilet jokes

What do you call a physically disabled man who is sitting on the toilet inside the handicapped stall inside the men's restroom?

Sex worker.

If a physically handicapped gay white male is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall, and if you are a gay white male that is well-endowed that is not physically handicapped, and if you want the physically handicapped gay white male who is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall to suck your dick, what do you do to convince him to suck your dick if you have a hard on and your horny as hell?

Put $25.00 under the handicapped stall before you put your dick under the handicapped stall.

You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”

Your mama is so ugly, she doesn't have to flush the toilet. She already scared the shit out of it.

I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.

My love for you is like poop.

Whenever I feel you, I have to run to the toilet and flush you away.

What did Helen Keller's mother do to her when she was mad at her?

She left the plunger in the toilet, she put doorknobs on all the walls, and she rearranged the furniture.

When I'm peeing in a toilet I don't pee directly into the water. I pee on the curved part of the bowl beside the water because I figure it splashes less, but when you're peeing that close to the edge, the sporadic tiny offshoots of pee become a greater threat.

I'm not sure if the accumulation of these offshoots is greater than the potential splashback from peeing mid-bowl. It's possible that I'm thinking about this too much, but it's also possible that I'm not thinking about this enough.

What do youuuuuuuuuuu Oh f***, my mom is gonna kill me! My shit is stuck on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!