New Time Jokes - Page 10 - Worst Jokes Ever

What kind of rape victim has a shower ten times a day?

The type that gets raped a lot

How do you know if a rapist loves you?

He will rape you many times

Your hairline so far back it was in a different time zone on a flight with you

Every time my cousin and i we settle it out with our game a so we play rock paper sissors 😂🤣🤣

I could tell my cousin you are so anoying but she told me first so we both said it at the same time 🫣🤣😂

My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tryed to fight me so i said: IF you wanna fight me ill run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs ill already be down the stairs waiting and he started crying

Someone: PLEASE EAT I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE *Me tryna remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because ive already googled it and given up because it takes too long* Me: Na yeah I still have 19 days left

your hairline goes even further back than the last time your parents said i love you

True story in 1986in the midst of the HIV epidemic they made condoms.available to the public at that time me and my boyfriend were 13 years old my boyfriend was so happy these will make great water balloons and I was even happier I did not have to pack.a.lunch for school tomorrow lol

Me: I been up all night, no sleep—

The lie detector I didn’t know I had: lie.

Me: stfu! I’m just singing!

Lie detector: you literally listen to music all the time... you almost don’t even sleep!

Me: THEN WHY THE FUCK DID TOU SAY IT’S A LIE, WHEN I SAID I DIDN’T SLEEP?!

lie detector: it’s 3:00 AM in 8 minutes, you usually close your eyes to sleep when it’s 5:00 AM....... You get waken up at 7:00 AM...... you only sleep two hours......

911 happened a while ago and it's slowly losing it's fame

TIME FOR A REMAKE

What are the odds of you being in a relationship that is going on in the next few months?

Random words in my keyboard:

The most annoying part of this game has always been that the players don’t know how much time it takes to get to the table before you start playing them.

hey siri, skip to friday

My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgent coming in tomorrow im super excited to work with him the next day we had to do our first ever open hart surgery so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient so we finished the surgery and went out side for a smoke and we were talking I said why did you keep the patients blood on your glove? He replied we in my free time I test it for anything diseases HIV the next day I got invited to his house and we had some drinks I said this is amazing red tea what is in it just the 2000 people you have cut opened .

It was a important knockout game for Al Nassr 🔥 I came to Riyad to see my idol Cristiano Ronaldo play, It was my dream for a long time 🤩 I took a cab to the stadium but the driver dropped me off at a haunted house instead 😔 As soon as I entered the house I saw a ghost☠️ but the very next moment I realized its my idolo Ronaldo 🥳 Thank you Ronaldo for meeting me 😭♥️