I just threw some cigarette butts on the ground while I was driving. I wasn't clean after this.
My friend says, "Time flies when having fun," so when he was gaming, I threw his clock to test that theory.
I saw a guy beat his girlfriend to a pulp after his girlfriend threw a phone in his face I offered to call an ambulance but he said he was fine
Johnny had 55 pineapples. He threw three at his friend. How many does he have now?
None because he was pistol whipped then shot at point blank range with a sawed off shotgun covered in fluoroantimonic acid which burned a hole in his skull causing his brain to melt and rupture nerve cells all over his friends. Then his arms and legs were stuffed into a wheat thresher which was used to harvest the meat of the enslaved children. Then his corpse was molested.
sso i was in the lunch room and was sitting by the peanut allergic kids table i stood up and i threw a opened bag of peanuts at them and yelled. "25 kill streak" 🤣😂
Y does Jesus hate skittles Because they fall threw his hands
I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldnt get up out of his wheelchair, and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.
Your mama is so fat and stupid. She got hit by a school bus. Her reply was "who threw that Twinkie at me.
Yo mama so fat, a bus ran into her and she said "WHO THREW THAT TWINKIE AT ME?!"
There once was 3 men on an airplane and one bit into an apple and said this is disgusting and threw it out the window the 2nd man bit into a banana and said this is rotten and he threw it out the window the 3rd man bit into a bomb and screamed " ALL MY TEETH FELL OUT" and he threw it out the window. Meanwhile, on the ground, a police officer was walking and he saw a kid crying and he went up to him and asked him why he was crying he replied an apple came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head! the police officer said that is weird and kept on walking. Then he saw another kid crying and the police officer asked why are you crying and he answered a banana came flying out of the sky and hit he on the head the officer said this has been a strange day. Then he says a kid laughing and he asked why he was laughing and he said while he was laughing my dad farted and the house blew up.
One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully of him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying "I fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease. Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"
Why do Indian people have bad tempers? Because when they were growing their parents told them they couldn't have a cow so they threw a tantrum instead.
Twin towers are like identitical twins and i threw a paper airplane
What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him?
That’s a salt!
A man who drinks a lot is told by his that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him. Later the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no.' He says to his friend' if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Dont worry' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no' the man says producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'Whats the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'
So There was a male whale and a female whale swimming threw the ocean .One day the male whale sees a ship and says "that's the ship that killed my parents" . So they go to the ship and blow the ship over and throw the men overboard into the sea. The male whale sees the man who killed his parents and he was still alive so he opened his mouth and went for the man but out nowhere the female whale yells. " HEY!!, I was in it for the blowjob but I'm not gonna eat sea men"
my teacher asked me what my favirote number was yesterday and i said 2977, i chose 91 for my football jersey number and sharpied a 1 after the other 1, and my teacher mr jacksons dad died in 9/11 and when he was talking about it friday the 9th i threw a paper airplane at him and got suspended for 3 days starting monday
My sister said she was as fat as a coconut so I threw one at her and she was right
My bro said food was cool. So I threw a piece of cool chicken at him. For some reason he hit me, OOF.
