This jokes

Mbu some guys look financially stable until you start dating them... Mbu wait I see how this week goes...🤔

Why the fuck is this guy calling me a crying bitch?

Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?

What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.

P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.

See, this is the best thing about no such thing as vampires because I'd be the first person to say drinks are on me.

This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!

Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

Stacy: lol

"This is the dude who assassinated JFK."

"If you got a question, just shoot!"

My friend: I want to cut myself.

Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.

This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"

God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."

Took my receipt to the sperm bank so I can get this comeback.

How ironic is this?! I was playing Jenga before the first plane hit the Twin Towers.

I just got my COVID vaccine, and this lady said, "You have no idea what you put in your body." I said, "Yet you are eating chorizo."

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that Keagan's FIFA team should be this terrible, also the problem is that Keagan is a Real Madrid fan.

I was playing hide-n-seek with my dad and he hid, but I could never find him till this day.

This is 15 first-year treating a swan.

Students return: "Without payment?"

The word "I die with many important problems."

Later, you answer this point: "DSD, rats?"

Thanks Ethan for all you've done. We've both made mistakes when all is said and done, but just thanks for being a good friend. This is officially my last post on here, Ethan-Real 1.

What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?

Hold on to your nuts, this one's gonna blow!

What goes up but never comes down? Your age. You have probably heard this joke before.

I am so disappointed in this race.

Brown skinned street shitters, goddamn, the lowest of the low southeast Asians, lazy monkey pig-dog duck fetus eating rice brainlets always on their phones, no IQ, ugly, uncivilized untermensch subhumans.

This is how animals were named.

"Bye Son." *cuts call*. What are we talking about?

"Bison. Perfect."