They jokes

Orphan

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find their way home.

Cop

Why do kids want to become cops?

They want to find the guy who touched them.

Orphan

Why can orphans get away with being bad at school? Because when the teacher says, "I want to have a parent/teacher conference," they just go about their day.

Orphan

Why do orphans not love their parents?

Because they don’t have parents.

Orphan

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they don't know where home is.

Condom

Tyler only has a kid because they don't make condoms the size of Lego Men.

Orphan

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't make it a home run.

People

I have a riddle for you:

10 people are on a boat, but they all die due to a tsunami except the captain.

Then, when he gets home, his wife serves him “penguin meat.”

Once he eats it, he starts crying.

Why?

Difference

What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?

They both talk like they're on fent.

Snack

What's a prostitute's favorite snack?

Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.

Friend

I was talking to my friends and they said a random topic about cats, and I'm like, "Water you talking about?" =3

Ice

In Antarctica, there are ice dicks for ladies to hop onto.

Little do they know I've been waiting for this moment.

Jedi

Why don't Jedis make puns that often?

They usually have to force them. (I hate myself for that!)

Dog

Why do dogs howl?

Because that's the other contraction they know.