They jokes
Do you know why they call me battery saver?
I get turned on when it’s below 10%.
You know, you should adopt a pet. So then you can feel the pain that your parents felt when they adopted you... wait... also the regret after.
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Because every time they’re at the corner, they build a store.
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook. All they wanted was books, but got magazines instead.
What’s the difference between a fly and Lady Diana?
The sound when they hit the windshield.
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
There is a joke that did not enter this page... Why? She is afraid they will laugh at her!
How are women like swimming pools?
They cost a great deal of money to maintain considering the time you spend inside.
Why don't Indians play baseball?
Every time they reach a corner, they make a shop.
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
How do 4 gay guys fit on one stool at the same time?
They flip it over.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
There were four people who went to land... only three returned... Why?
They left someone for memories!
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.
I don't get why bakers aren't wealthier. They make so much dough.
Why was 2019 afraid of 2020?
Because they had a fight, and 2021.
At the job interview, they asked me, “Where do you see yourself in five years?”
I told him, “I think we’ll still be using mirrors in five years.”