They jokes
I went to McDonald's and I saw a line of fat people because they were selling free hamburgers.
Go up to your friend and say: "It smells like updog."
They will likely reply: "What's updog?"
To which you reply: "Nothing much, what about you?"
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, grabbed Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
Jill said yes, lifted up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
How did Helen Keller burn her cheek? She answered the iron.
How did she burn the other cheek? They called back.
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
What do an orphan's parents and the Predator have in common?
They are both invisible.
Q: Why does an orphan do badly at Baseball?
A: Because they can't find home.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Because the grass is tickling their ballsacks!
WARNING: READ THIS JOKE ALOUD!
Was it the pills that stopped his coughing, or was it the coffin they carried him off in?
There are two types of faces:
The handsome one, but the wallet is ugly.
Then there is this personal face full of bumps, but even they lack a wallet.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
I take all my anger out on orphans. Why?
Because they have no parents to run to.
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-
Why do melons always have big weddings?
Because they cantaloupe!
An HDMI cable and an electrical outlet went on a date. It didn't go well, because they couldn't connect.
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.
They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t go home.