They jokes
Why can’t you trust an atom?
Because they make up literally everything.
What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
Why don't ants get sick?
Because they have anty-bodies.
Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.
Why do they have fences around cemeteries?
Because people are dying to get in.
Bored? Punch an orphan! Who are they gonna tell, their parents?
You know, they didn't add the word "retard" into the dictionary for nothing.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t have a home to run to.
Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
'Cause they don't got balls to scratch.
Why don’t pedophiles win races?
They like to come in a little behind.
I got a call from McDonald's; they want their sign back.
Why do orphans only have 362 days of the year?
... bc they don’t have Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, or Thanksgiving.
What did the hermit crabs do on Mother's Day?
They shellabrated their mommy.
What do hookers and porn stars have in common? They get paid for sex and get STD's.
Why do orphans like to go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
If you're bored, punch an orphan in the face. What is he gonna do, tell his parents?
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home plate.
Why don't churches have WiFi?
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
A man is on his death sentence, and he gets to choose his last meal.
He asks his guard for a McDonald's Ice Cream, and lives a very long life. They never found a working machine.