They jokes
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
Go punch an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
When I was young, I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back, except they didn't get back up.
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they got plane pizza instead of cheese!
Your mama so fat that when she went to McDonald's, they said, "Sorry, you've had enough, ma'am."
Twin Tower jokes are funny because they are dead.
Why are Americans so bad at chess? Cause they lost 2 towers.
Want to know why some astronomers are gay?
It’s because they want to be in Uranus.
How is an orphan like a boomerang?
They always come back!
Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?
Two Asians walked into a strip club and they went to a cashier. They put in their names: her name was He Gay and his name was Shi A Ho.
What does a bar fly and a necrophiliac have in common?
They both enjoy a cold one once in a while.
If Hillary and Biden got locked in a room together, all they would talk about is how to ruin America and make a plan to steal children.
If you're ever bored, kick an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Why are hospitals always freezing?
They need to keep the vegetables cold.
Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove.
One morning, Peppy and George came downstairs for breakfast, but they got a plate of juicy bacon. Their dad had recently gone missing, so they ate it quite sadly.
The next morning, they went to school and asked their teacher, "What is bacon made out of?" The teacher replied, "Pigs, why?" Peppa and George looked horrified.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, “Mommy, mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs, and my ball got away and into your closet. When I went to get it, Daddy came in with the lady next door, and they started hugging and kissing. The lady next door took off Daddy’s clothes, and Daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed. The lady next door got on top of Daddy and started...”.
The mother cuts him off and says, “Just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me.” A couple hours later, the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face, shouting, “I’m leaving you... Go ahead, Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier.” Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. “Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs, and my ball got away and into your closet. When I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door, and you both started hugging and kissing. The lady next door took off your clothes, and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed. The lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing Mom did with Uncle Joe last summer.”