Thereness jokes

How do ducks fart?

Out their butt, quack.

Roll your eyes back, you might find a brain back there.

There was this Down syndrome boy that always wanted to be a cop, and he did. He pulled someone over and said, "Know why I pulled you over?"

The guy replied, "Because I was speeding?"

He said, "No, because you're black."

Why are orphans always sad?

Because their parents aren't there to cheer them up.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms or legs.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

Knock knock.....Who’s there... Not the little boy.

Why did the mushroom get a new house?

Because there wasn’t mushroom!

Why are there not that many phones in China? Because there’s too much Wing and Wong, so they will "wing" the wrong number.

I bet you're a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, btw your roasts are not fucking funny, they're bullshit like your face and your hairline.

I got my sister a book and she cried there, but I forgot she was blind.

If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.

Part 2: He walks up to a stake and nails himself there. Then he finds the knife and says to someone to find a cake to celebrate his death, but everybody came. That was the sign that nobody loved him, and that's how you know if people love you.

There is one good part about paedophiles... they go slow in school zones.

There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.

What do you call a person with a hole in their shoe?

A Christian.

If 4 birds are sitting on a fence and one gets shot, how many are still on the fence?

None, the rest fly away.

Why is there air conditioning at a hospital?

To keep the vegetables cool and fresh.

Yum!

Imagine there’s a funny joke here. Imagine it? Great! Now check yourself into an insane asylum because you’re schizophrenic.

Knock knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You're welcome. Hehehehe😛😛😛

Sally fell off the swing. How did she fall off?

She had no arms.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not Sally.

There were two twin brothers, Lucas and Marcus. Marcus got a girlfriend while Lucas stayed single.

A few weeks later, Lucas was caught kissing Marcus's girlfriend, and Marcus comes over and says: "Babe, I know we're twins, but I'm Marcus, and that's Lucas you were kissing." And his girlfriend looks at him and says: "I know."