Thereness jokes
There are three Mexicans in a car. Who's driving?
The cop!
Did you know there's a brand of coffee specifically for pedophiles?
It's called the Ep-bean.
What did Scorpion say to the ugly person?
"STAY OVER THERE!"
During the Wintery Wackiness Wars!
A Soviet Sergeant, stationed stilly near a sloped summit with his silly soldiers!
Then a shout sails from the tippy-top: "A Finnish fighter's fantastic force fractures a hundred heroic Honchos!"
The Kommandant's kerfuffle commences, commanding a caravan of one hundred comrades to conquer the crest!
Nifty navigation notes nil, the nasty news nabs many! After an Hour, hush descends. The high voice hollers, "A Finnish fighter's fantastic force fractures a thousand heroic Honchos!"
Kommander fumes, forcing a further flurry, flinging one thousand fine fellows skyward!
Nearly two hours now and the noisy nuisance ceases, then the shouting starts: "A Finnish fighter's fantastic force fractures ten thousand heroic Honchos!"
The Kommandant kaput! Ten thousand troopers take the trek, taking tanks, trundling skyward, to take the terrain!
Four fearsome, fretful hours then a soldier in tatters comes tumbling, talking: "Stop sending up soldiers, sir! There's two Finns fighting fiercely!"
How do tourists feed their kids?
Here comes the airplane, here comes the second one.
Did you hear? There's a new fast food restaurant coming: Jacko in the Box.
All right, I know one joke. Um, there's a mollusk, see? And he walks up to a sea...
Well, he doesn't walk up, he swims up.
Well, actually, the mollusk isn't moving, he's in one place.
And then the sea cucumber, well, they... I mixed up.
There was a mollusk and a sea cucumber. None of them were walking, so forget that...
There was this mollusk and he walks up to a sea cucumber. Normally they don't talk, sea cucumbers, but in a joke, everyone talks.
So just then, the sea cucumber looks over to the mollusk and says, "With fronds like these, who needs anemones?"
Your hairline's so far back, even Rosa Parks refused to sit in the back; it went all the way there itself.
Did you know there's a place in Germany called Hanover?
Must be lots of drunks there.
Do you know the F in "orphan" stands for family?
There is no F in "orphan".
Exactly.
How do terrorists feed their children?
"Here comes the airplane!"
Why can't England play Clash, Chess, or Checkers?
Because they lost their queen.
How do terrorists feed their children?
"Here comes the airplane!"
What's the difference between milk and a cancer patient?
There's none, they both don't age well.
What's the difference between a grenade and your wife? There's none. Take out the ring and half of the house is gone.
Why are English people bad at chess? 'Cause they lost their Queen.
Why can't the US play chess? 'Cause they lost their towers.
Why does everyone say there are mines in Bosnia? There are no-
So I was living with a girl for a few weeks, and it was nice until she found out that I was there.
How do terrorists feed their children?
Here comes the airplane.
Knock knock. Who’s there? We ask the questions!!!!!!!!