The jokes

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

My birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

What is the one word orphans don’t know? Homework.

What did the Titanic say while sinking?

"It's going down."

What’s the worst part of a vegetable?

A wheelchair.

Ring.. Ring.. Yes this is Dave from the Orphanage, "you make 'em we take 'em", how may I be of service?

Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.

What did the hot dog say to the condom? "Hot dog condom style."

Why was the orphan confused at the baseball game?

They kept yelling, "Go home!"

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and your parents?

Nothing. They are both just memories.

What can jump the highest?

Emo kids, some are still in the air.

In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.

Sound familiar? 🤔

Well, in September 11th...

Chuck Norris makes the living room the dying room!

What's the difference between an orphan and a criminal?

The criminal is wanted.

What's the difference between Jesus and a holy whore?

Jesus got pegged against a cross.

What’s the difference between orphans and apples?

Apples get picked.

I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.

What would they do? Go to their family?

What did one aborted baby say to the other? Nothing. They're both dead.

Why is the U.S. so mad about the Twin Towers? It was an accident. The pilots were new.

Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.

Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.

Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.