That jokes
Next person that says 67, I am gonna yell "9/11" and sweep their feet.
Louis Armstrong and Tork Poettschke go for a walk.
One says to the other, "My wife always says that icke is no worse than the other men."
"How many men does your wife have?"
What do you call a white man that can dance?
A faggot.
Bertold Brecht & Tork Poettschke visit the places of their youth together. One says to the other: "Here used to be the Phoenix Lake. Where did he go?" "That was probably a pirate ..."
What do you call a disabled person that has no legs and likes being alone?
Leaving, walking.
My friend's mom once told me that when Trump was elected president, she said to my friend: "Hey look, an orange became president. We got an orange as a president before a girl as president."
People always call me heartless. That’s not true. I have a heart... it just wasn’t meant for you.
Yo Mama is so fat that Nationwide took nine years to get on her side.
All right, I know one joke. Um, there's a mollusk, see? And he walks up to a sea...
Well, he doesn't walk up, he swims up.
Well, actually, the mollusk isn't moving, he's in one place.
And then the sea cucumber, well, they... I mixed up.
There was a mollusk and a sea cucumber. None of them were walking, so forget that...
There was this mollusk and he walks up to a sea cucumber. Normally they don't talk, sea cucumbers, but in a joke, everyone talks.
So just then, the sea cucumber looks over to the mollusk and says, "With fronds like these, who needs anemones?"
I think they are New York Jets fans and the Jets QB helped them... That's why one of them was off target.
Someone prank calls a general. The general hangs up and goes, "Kids these days have no respect for their elders. That's why I send them all to die."
If your wife has boxes and boxes ending up at your front door from her online shopping habit, tell her that you’ve only had one box through the marriage and that she should be happy.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile.
And I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old!"
What's an emo's favorite type of necklace? The kind that attaches to a ceiling beam.
President Chumples memorialised Charlie Kirk by saying, "He had a real shot at being president."
That's not a joke. The fat fuck actually said that after pan face got shot.
Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?
Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.
Someone told me I looked gay today. I told him that my clothes just came out of the closet this morning.
What’s one thing that comes up at the worst possible time and ruins your day?
A period.
You will find your dad that left to get the milk before your hairline.
Did you know the food that was on the plane?
It was the bomb.