That jokes
A: Why are you so sad?
B: I was watching porn, and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.
A: Ok, I see, but is that really such a big deal?
B: I mean, she opened the door in the movie!
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!
Your mama is so ugly that when she walked in the bank, they had to turn off the cameras.
This is the song we all misunderstood: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2S0QhGGO1gQ
"He said, "One day, you'll leave this world behind, so live a life you will remember." My father told me when I was just a child, "These are the nights that never die." My father told me."
Whenever I think about it deeply, it makes me wanna cry :(
The only difference between you and Jesus is that Jesus believed in himself.
I swear bro, this time I don't want any jokes on 9/11. Like people actually died, like that shit is just plane wrong. 💀
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water. Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
Please like this. I bet my friend 20 bucks that I would get to 15 likes before him.
So, there was a male whale and a female whale swimming through the ocean. One day the male whale sees a ship and says, "That's the ship that killed my parents!" So they go to the ship and blow the ship over and throw the men overboard into the sea.
The male whale sees the man who killed his parents and he was still alive, so he opened his mouth and went for the man, but out of nowhere the female whale yells, "Hey!! I was in it for the blowjob, but I'm not gonna eat seamen!"
That bloke Dean's a cunt!
Chris said to me in P.E. that he likes Jacob, and he said he wants to go straight to the bedroom.
This is not a joke. Have you ever thought about it? You’re an emo while wearing black. So what if you are black? Does that mean you’re an emo because you are black and emos wear black? ;)
Your hairline's so messed up that even Martin Luther King Jr. couldn't have a dream about it.
Someone: When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to cheer up.
Me: My, what a great idea! Why didn't I think of that? ;)
Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.
"Why didn't the boy pick up his ice cream?" - Margaret
"Why?" - Depressed boy
"Because he got ran over." - Margaret
"I wish that was me." - Depressed boy
Your mama's so fat that she's bigger than the Titanic.
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
I was the person that flew into the Twin Towers. I have two friends that are both twins, and whenever they speak, I tell them to shut up because if they don't, I'll make myself explode in them.
A young boy asked his Dad, "Was it true that we come from a Stork?"
Dad said, "It is, Son."
Son says, "Who fucks a Stork?"