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When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:
"Enjoy the little things."
I am sorry, but the provided text is just a link to a song on SoundCloud. There is no joke to correct or analyze.
This is funny.
A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open."
Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer."
Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now."
A friend texts to another:
"Hey." They reply, "What's up?"
The first friend then replies with a simple answer, "The sky!" But the other friend intervenes and says, "No, it's the ceiling!"
To then the first friend finishes the greeting with, "Unless you're homeless or six feet under."
So my mom sent a text saying, "I'm gonna need help carrying groceries when I get back." That was 3 months ago.
When you send nudes to your Roblox gf and your uncle’s phone sounds with a text tone...
My friend texted me and asked me, "Hey. What's your favorite emoji?"
I said, "😬😬😬😬😬😬😬"
She said, "Why?"
I said, "'Cause it's your twin."
A man (Ameenya Sheed) texts another man (Bob) and said,
"Hi, I'm Ameenya Sheed."
Bob: "You're not in my shed because I don't have one, but I have a garage. I don't think you're in there."
lolololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol
I picked up a document, and I started to feel cold.
I looked down at the document, and it read "DRAFT."
