Once my twin brother died from a plane crash. His last words were, "If it's a bomb, I'll give it a 9/11."
Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.
Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.
Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.
Why did the influencer terrorist get arrested?
Because his TikTok blew up...
What does an Al Qaeda terrorist and a flexible man have in common?
They can blow themselves up.
What do parents feeding their kids and terrorists have in common?
“Here comes the airplane!”
What is a group of singing terrorists called? A Taliband.
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
Are suicide bombers taught properly how to fly, or...
Are they just given a quick crash course?
What's a suicide bomber's biggest fear?
Dying alone.
Where do terrorists go for a drink?
At the Allahu-ak Bar.
What did the terrorist do when his kidneys failed?
Dial-ISIS!
When I was in middle school, I was kidnapped by a terrorist organization.
Al-gebra.
I stopped a terrorist from killing 100 people on a plane using self-control.
When you call the Middle Eastern suicide hotline, they ask you if you can fly a plane.
I'd tell a 9/11 joke, but it would crash and burn.
When you're in the World Trade Center and you connect to airplane wifi.
Read the name.
Joke: It felt good going through those Twin Towers!
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because they ordered pepperoni but instead they got... Plane.
Why am I in jail?
All I did was cause 9/11.
What happened when two invisible giants knocked over their blocks?
9/11.
