Technology jokes
I saw a cyclist in the road today, so I ran over him and he said in a robotic voice, "SHUTTING DOWN!"
Girlfriend: You remind me of a cellphone.
Ex-Boyfriend: How and why?
Girlfriend: Because you're about to die!
Alya, do you have Discord?
Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.
Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked.
Now it’s $3.99.
I also got mine replaced, hehe, I have a special surprised for you UwU
For all the Harry Potter fans:
A VPN is occlumency for smart devices, and our ISP is a legilimens.
People in 1 Ad: I bet we will have the best technology ever in 2023.
2023: GO BACK NOW! THERE'S 50 THOUSAND GENDERS, DUMB GEN Z, TIK TOK, WE NEED JESUS!
Why should you never give an orphan a phone?
Because they wouldn't be able to find the home button.
I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.
Where did the software developer go?
I don’t know, he ransomware!
You know when you sign up for something and it says "I'm not a robot"? I guess he never had the chance to tick that.
What’s the difference between a photocopier and the flu?
One makes facsimiles; the other makes sick families.
Stephen Hawking drove too far from the wall and unplugged.
He also forgot to pay the power bill.
If you replaced the boss in Portal with a boy, you would hear Stephen Hawking.
I made a website for orphans. It doesn't have a homepage.
Can disabled enable dark mode?
I would create an orphan website...
But you need a home page to do that.
(Since somebody stole this joke before) 🤷♀️
Stephen Hawking: like a cross between Nikola Tesla and... a Tesla.
Why did the cellphone get glasses? Because it lost its contacts!
My mom told me to unplug all the electronics, so I unplugged my grandma's life support.
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.