Suicide jokes
When an emo kid jumps out of a tree, what happens when he hits the ground?
Nothin' much, he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope.
What did Hitler kill himself with? A "Nein"-millimeter.
What's the difference between you and Hitler?
Hitler knew when to kill himself.
There are so many things going through my head. Sadly, none of it is a 9mm.
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up is when they hang themselves.
Memes
What's the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person?
They both hang...
what's the difference between hitler and you?
one didn't keep posting on twitter about killing themselves.
Friend 1: Eyyy gurl
Me: Hey! (Fake smile)
Friend 2: Hey g-guys what 'bout we play would you rather?
6 hours later
Friend 2: So (name) would u rather? 1. "Hang" out with me Or 2. "Jump" 1 times?
Me...e-eh?...Why not both????? We could just "Jump" while "Hanging" out right?
I thought today was going to be a good day when I woke up this morning. But then I got to the store and they said they were out of rope.
Me: Man, I wish my clothes were emo.
Friend: Why?
Me: So they would hang themselves.
If you wanna really know how to get under my skin, give me a razor and maybe we'll talk ;)
Dentist: Open up, sir.
Me: So... I hate my life, my family, my sisters, my dog, my cat, and I tried to take a bath with my toaster, but my dog took it. That's why I hate my dog. And my cat died trying to chew my rope; it choked... Yea.
Dentist: I... meant your mouth... so I can clean your teeth.
Me: :O Ohhhh, my bad.
Dentist: Do you need help??
Me: Yep.
Dentist: ...
Me: ....
A depressed kid takes a drink of water and someone takes it and takes a drink. "Oh come on, the train stopped, the rope broke, I couldn't get on the building, the gun was empty, the knife was dull, the bridge was too low, and the cliff was nonexistent, and now you took the poison!"
I only have sex with suicidal bitches because that pussy [is] limited edition.
What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.
When someone tells me to kill myself,
Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time.
It has been rumored that Disney is developing a movie based on suicide. The title?
Finding Emo.
Are you a knife? Because damn, I want you inside of me ;)
Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.
1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.
What’s the difference between emos and Hitler?
Hitler didn’t post on social media when he wanted to kill himself.